New Year.

Pondering...

Somehow or rather. I choose to not go to changi airport to pick someone up or welcome him home. How dumb can this get. Seriously. You want to pick your boyfriend up then okay. go ahead. u asked me to plan and give u details, you went ahead to do what u want. i gave a place for dinner, u said no. u wanted to meet at the airport 3 hours ahead of time to eat and talk and you are afriad we'd be late. I dont really know what u decided to tell anyone else. but if u all had fucking plans. then why the fuck meet for dinner? meet at airport 10pm for an arrival at 1030. simple. u want to eat dinner at your place then dont ask anyone else to plan a place to eat. if you are going to overrule everything. then kindly not ask anyone to 'decide for you and give u details'. Negotiation is an art u do not have. arts scholar u may be. that requires 2 parties coming to an agreement. which somehow or rather u are either too pigheaded or egotistical to come to. you know who you are.

'explain why you are not there to him'. really. refer to above. i had enough of people like this in my life. EQ? thy dares breach into this realm? a higher EQ person cannot flare up at lower EQ people?. Nope. this isnt low EQ. its blatant in nature. choice has been done. you show your ugly side to people and you think they are stupid? no. they choose to let you be. either u arent worth changing much. or you never will anyways. why bother. did he specify he wants to see us or pick us up? no. just because people are available for things to be done doesnt mean that they should or will. expectance of this is naively proving one has a low EQ. So i see. when you have exams and have no time and choose not to put friends (or different friends due to different personal reasons) first but yourself. that is altruistically right? then we are both sinless.

Being a true friend is more than telling a friend what he wants to hear. nor telling him what u have tailored, what may be a horrid attempt at tact. if you hope people understand you yet make no effort to yourself to understand truly, people, in their conditions or reasons why they have done what they have done, to be whatever they are. then you have not crossed a tier far more worthy than a man's worth. if u choose to insist a person is wrong with all of you. then there can be no hope for any sort of kinship ties. judge not people. but circumstance. once u have analysed such as prior. then analyse choice. if u are traumatised or affected by eventuality, and have no access or no such comfort of the above, then cast not the first stone. if you are so free to analyse so much. you wont be who you are anymore. this opens a whole new topic of life choice and outcome which few are willing to dare themselves out to being.

'treasure that group of friends' if this be a true regard. amen. i will see forth such. if it be smite, then thou has no leverage to cast this stone.

what are we but souls? seek we not pleasures of flesh and mind? challenge you i forever shall, yet hold a torch for you, always i will. this is friendship. rather, soulship. remember this, forsake you i never shall. such length i am prepared to go for a true friend. maybe i should move on.


should our paths cross on this dark and dimly lit road, give thou a smile and thou shalt embrace thy soul with a tear.